Many people often ask if our children get better, recover, heal. Numerous professionals believe they don’t. If this is true then why bother trying?
The fact is that’s a lie! Much of what you may see now does heal and the rest they learn to live with. Unfortunately, it takes a long time but a commitment to Therapeutic Parenting enables us to see positive results along the way and Miraculous achievements in the long term.
It is frankly insulting when I hear other professionals saying the children are damaged for life! I was one of these children and life has never been a bed of roses but the love and consistency from my former foster mum and numerous others along the way has enabled me to eventually live a full and rewarding life.
I no longer punch people, tell lies, steal, run away, destroy things, wee on the carpet or hate everyone.
My internal working model is good, I have heaps of empathy and shame levels have reduced to such a degree, I don’t actually give a flying monkeys if people don’t like me. I know I have a good heart but mouth sometimes lets me down. Oh dear that’s a shame....
What is the residue? What do I still struggle to manage? High cortisol levels Hyper vigilance Some trust issues (I keep my circle very small) Sensory issues (they do my head in and everyone else’s) Takes me longer to self regulate than most around me Sugar addiction The occasional swear word (that’s a lie) Impatience I don’t suffer fools gladly
There is always hope for our children and TP gives us the approach and tools to help our children heal.
The NATP was set up to help you to help your child with help and support from others who also believe there is light at the end of tunnel. Don’t let anyone switch the light off!
Sarah Dillon (former child in care and founding committee member)
