"So, yet another nice day out ruined! I don’t know why I bother. It’s so dispiriting.
The plan was to go to the zoo and take a lovely picnic lunch. I told all the children this morning what we were going to do and they all seemed pleased and excited.
First of all, we had the whole “let’s go out in ripped and dirty clothing” nonsense to get over. This took all my patience and negotiating skills! I should have set their clothes out the night before.
On the way there (amazingly), there was only one incident in the car where Rosie and Katie had a shouting argument, complete with slapping and other behaviours requiring a referee.
Once we got to the zoo there was so much silly behaviour it was unbelievable. William did not want to look at any of the animals because they “were staring at him”. Rosie walked around all day with a face like thunder and her arms folded. She managed to force herself to have lunch but was very unhappy it was a picnic rather than a meal in the café. She was very vocal about the failing of the picnic, which I had spent over an hour preparing.
Sophie and Charley both managed to poo themselves at the same time, which was fun trying to sort out in the public toilets with all the parents judging me. Once I had sorted them out, I noticed William had wet himself but appeared oblivious. I seem to spend a lot of time in public loos!
On the way home, it was a complete nightmare: a full-on punch-up in the car, with another screaming contest and William being sick, literally everywhere. Rosie said the zoo idea was really stupid and she isn’t going on any other “days out for losers”.
They are so ungrateful. Nothing I ever do is enough and they don’t appreciate anything. It’s ruined, thrown back in, my face or discarded somehow.
I don’t think I can be bothered anymore, but life will be so boring!
The more I plan for a nice time, the more I pay."
Extract taken: Therapeutic Parenting Essentials: Moving from Trauma to Trust
One of the hardest issues that parents face is when their child is unable to accept the nicer things in life. Sometimes it feels like the harder the parents work to make a special day or gift, the harder the child works to spoil it in some way.
It can feel like sabotage, join us for a webinar on Thursday 27th May at 8pm with Sami. Sami will share why it can feel like children deliberately ruin the day and the nice the nice things that we want to provide.
Click here to find out more - The Real Child – Sabotage