Sibling rivalry with children who have developmental trauma is NOTHING like ‘normal’ sibling rivalry.
A few statements are more irritating to a therapeutic parent, struggling with sibling rivalry, than ‘all children do that,’ or similar.
The rivalry we see between our children is literally a fight for survival. It is often early, learnt behaviour with strong foundations in visceral fear and jealousy. It differs from standard sibling rivalry with securely attached children, in its intensity, relentlessness and longevity. For this reason, siblings are very often separated because it is felt that most parents cannot manage the diverse behaviours, competitiveness and rivalry.
Having raised five adopted full siblings herself Sarah Naish holds the view that it is almost always best to keep the children together, BUT the correct level of experience, respite and individual attention must be part of the support package.
Read more about this in the NATP resource – Sibling Rivalry
This resource can also be found in our Member's area, along with over 150 other downloadable resources on a variety of subjects relating to Therapeutic Parenting.