Child: On the surface what do you see?
Adult: A ‘normal’ child
Child: How old am I chronologically?
Adult: 11 years old
Child: I don’t feel like an 11yr old
Adult: How old do you feel?
Child: I feel like a toddler
Adult: Don’t be ridiculous
Child: What do I do that concerns you?
Adult: Steal, lie, control, swear, oppose, defy, hide away, hoard food, kick off, the list goes on
Child: I wish I could stop doing these things
Adult: I wish you could too. Actually, I think you can stop
Child: How?
Adult: Just choose to behave, think about the consequences of your actions, consider the feelings of others
Child: Ok, I must be a bad kid if I can’t do what other children my age can
Adult: I didn’t say you were bad, it’s just your behaviour that needs to change
Child: You don’t need to say it, I already know I am
Adult: You just need to try harder
Child: How?
Adult: Start listening to adults and have more respect. Follow the rules
Child: I’m scared of adults
Adult: Don’t be silly
Child: I can’t help how I feel
Adult: Just pause before to do something and put your ‘thinking cap’ on
Child: With my Brain? I haven’t got much of a thinking cap!
Adult: what’s wrong with your brain?
Child: Read the books, do the training, join the NATP and then you’ll understand that MY brain is in a wheelchair! It needs rewiring. I’m stuck in staying alive mode, I can’t think before I do something.
I NEED you to be my ‘thinking cap’, I NEED you to help rewire my brain.
Adult: That could take years!
Child: Yes, Many
Adult: Where do I begin?
Child: THERAPEUTIC PARENTING!
Sarah Dillon ©
For the past few months my 5 year old has demanded that I pretend she is 3 or younger every day. She is telling me how old she feels at any particular time without realising it.
This is so true. My son is 11 and recently he said “I may be 11 but inside I am only 9 and some days I am only 7”.
Today I have had a call from the school as he is behaving like a toddler.